On this day

I started this blog with the purpose of me coping with my boyfriends death. It's been 3 years since Josh passed away, I want to dedicate this post to him in a short memory. I remembered the first time I saw you after you moved from Miami, this was when we used to talk on Facebook and we had decided to just hang out. Seeing you in plain sight as I walked towards you and you walked towards me, I'll never forget my heart was beating at a thousand and I kept thinking if my hair looked good, you were wearing all black and of course your signature cap, you always wore one lol skateboard in hand, you smiled and I shyly looked away all the time. The guy I always wanted to be mine , the guy I fell in love with after all these years was finally next to me and that feeling of having you there was just enough for me. We talked about summer, we talked about the many things the past year presented us with, I laughed at your sarcastic jokes which half of them were about me, the infamous "little girl" line you always to call me. I remember this day clearly because on this day I had my first kiss with you, you and me we were a story , probably a love story of our ages. My dad had called me after you and I were just talking which felt like a second but was obviously more. I had to go and I remember not wanting to, I remember going up for the hug and we hugged and it felt like time had stopped and all I wanted was to be hugged , I remember the safeness in that hug I remember your smell and I remember thinking I never wanted to let go but as I slowly pulled away your face closer to mine and you leaned in the for the kiss. We kissed. Soft sweet kiss, I remember your hand on my cheek and I remember how red my face got that if became our inside joke "hot face" I said my goodbye and I remembered as we walked away we both looked back and ran up again for a kiss again. The walk back I was so happy I couldn't stop smiling I couldn't stop giggling , I called my best friend Andrea and I remember her yelling for joy "SEE BITCH OMG FUCKING FINALLY, I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU STEPH" it was an  amazing feeling, being back home I replayed that my moment over and over again. I listened to Dr. Dog- Heart it races and it was the best way to end my summer vacation and start my junior year. After that Josh and Steph became the popular common topic and the years after that nothing would ever be the same.