You're All The Good Things

Tomorrow you'll be laughing like a child

There's no real tomorrow

In a perfect world we would all be sitting down and hanging out living forever talking about where our life is headed and we would all still be together. The night our brains let our minds expand and go further down imagination lane, questioning why we're here and who is waiting for us on the other side, coming up with our own dreams and beliefs we realized that we will never know these answers... Until we die. Death is natural and I don't fear it, it's something that is going to happen and will happen we just don't know when and how, to believe this we look at the knowledge that's fill with contradictions and in return we fill our minds of what parts comfort us and makes us feel happy. We all want an answer to the biggest question everyone asks themselves at some point in our journey. What would it feel like to have your life flash before your eyes? And where do you go? And do you actually see the people that are still alive? Like I said we might never know the answer till we ourselves are no more. 

Forever

"You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you. That's where I'll be waiting."

Peter Pan

You missed when time and life shook hands and said goodbye - Modest Mouse

Such a mess

The month of March is just flying me by, it feels like just yesterday I was ringing in the New Year and now we're heading into the month of April. Getting through days I'm piled with work and school and feel like I haven't actually had time for myself and indulge myself in life's treasures, the day is already in repeat; never changing. When I can write Its like I'm trying to scribble scrabble all my thoughts at once! I wish I could just pause the day and cease it haha.

Just a little something

I created this blog not knowing exactly what it would be based on, wether it was going to be about fashion; hence the blog name "Coco for Givenchy" or anything and related to my life. I gave it some thought and what makes a good blog isn't just words or phrases but more of how deep and connected those words mean to you. For me to openly and publicly write the many changes that I'm going through in my life, I am fully aware of how vulnerable I'm setting myself up but I'm more than happy to share those memories and give you something of a last resort of boredom kill. 

New beginnings...

2014 just barely started about 2 months ago and it seems like i'm already dreading this year, its like i've been trying to close back to back chapters in my life. The life of someone I knew the most was cut too short and I bear at the thought of keeping all the things I wish I could have said forever in my heart. The things you wish that happened, the things you wish that didn't happen, the things you wish you would have said and the things you wished you wouldn't have said. Stop time and rewind a few months ago where you see a boy and a girl completely in love, airing in happiness and soaking in love, these things consume you and make you blind of all the realizations in life and like a dream that moment is gone. No matter how much you tried to protect me from the demons that inhabit my mind, confusion and sadness were two vital roles that took over, to help me cope with a sudden separation and heartbreak I did things I shouldn't have done and the "me" you once knew was no more. For a moment it's like my life was a complete limbo and my vision was clouded, "who am I?" "what am I doing?" "where are you?" I kept these questions on repeat and play like a tape recorder for all the days I have been alive and will be alive. Haunting is your own reflection and not knowing who that person is, the things you thought you wanted are the things that ended up destroying you. We latched on our promise that someday our "one day" would come, the promise I had made to you and the one you accepted unwillingly crept up like a cramp. The warmth of your hugs and the sweetness of your kisses lingered on me that love was on sight and that our day was going to happen.......... now all I have is our memories and that genuine smile you engraved in my mind. Life hits you with hard blows and you can only think its for the better, at least thats what I must believe in.. You now know the love and happiness that the ones that are left here can't comprehend. Like the poem from E.E Cummings "I carry your  heart (i carry it in my heart)" I will keep my promise.